Friday, July 28, 2006

OH, FUCK OFF!


Posted by Picasa
So, do you notice anything off in this picture? Oh, I don't know, like say maybe that there is no water coming out of the tap even though it is clearly on?

I discovered we had no water last night. While Hubby was at work, so there was nothing he could do to help fix it.

He THINKS he may have fixed it this morning but we don't know for how long it will stay fixed. FUN!

I'm starting to think that maybe I don't like this house so much now.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

My Weekend Version 2.5

Now with pictures, minus the words. If you want to see what I'm talking about, refer to the last post.

ME. Eating. Also that is the cowboy hat I risked life and limb to save. Stupid thing shrunk too.Posted by Picasa

Beautiful, secluded and mosquito infested.Posted by Picasa

Blogger is a Bitch. So is this Hello! Bullshit. I wanted all three pictures in one post. But whatever. So I give Up. Oh, yeah that's me on the tube. Can't you just sense the excitement? I mean seriously, don't I look just stoked? Yeah I didn't think so either. After doing the splits and falling in the water, I just didn't really want to do it anymore. Can't imagine why.Posted by Picasa

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

My Weekend, Version 2.0

Here we go, I am trying this again.

We went camping on Friday and Saturday. I'm told it was fun and that we had a blast. It really wasn't that bad, I'm just not a fan of camping.

We were alone and deserted and I enjoyed that, because I am my fathers daughter and I hate too many people being around. Friday anyway.

There were millions and billions of mosquitos out so I took my book into the tent to escape them. Bug spray seemed to be crack to them.

But before I hid myself away, this is the picture Hubby decided to take of me. This is the first picture he's taken of me while fully dressed or not changing in a while (yes he's a dirty pervert) and of course I'm stuffing my face. There are two pictures actually and I'm eating both times. I think he did that on purpose.
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Saturday people took over our beach (yes it's OURS) and that annoyed me very much because other people brought their dogs too. Little annoying yappy dogs, so we had to put our dogs on their leashes because they think all other dogs want to be their friends.

So we took our dogs out in the boat, and HE made me go tubing. Apparently I am not the most graceful person in the world because stupidly I tried to step into the tube, with one leg on the tube and the other in the boat and (you can see where this is going can't you?) wound up doing the splits inbetween the two items. Then I fell into the water. To his credit he never even laughed at me. Out loud anyway. So I had to climb back into the boat and try again. Then while on the tube I made him stop so I could put my goggles on because the poor baby was getting water in her eyes.
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Hubby took his turn and I flipped him out of the tube repeatedly and he seemed to be enjoying himself. Until I flipped him so good that he went skipping across the water smacking his bag all along. When I came around to pick him up he was calmly floating inplace and refused to go back in the tube.

So we went back to shore for lunch. Now, while camping because I hate it so much I don't have to do anything. Because hubby is just so happy I'm even there. Anyway, he's buliding the fire and cooking lunch while I sit on my ass finishing my book. (The Devil Wears Prada) Burgers are done and he even prepares it for me, then brings it to me. I take a bite and Ketchup and mustard squirt out all over my towel. And I in my best bitchiest voice screech "How much fucking sauce did you put in this?" He turns to look at me mouth open and staring, because that was bitchy even for me. He throws my napkins, literally throws them at me. And then realizes just HOW bitchy that was of me and tries to take my burger back.

I shook my head and apologized because even I have no idea where that came from. I felt it coming and just couldn't stop myself. So we chalked it up to too much sun and packed our stuff up and headed home.

But that can't be all because I need to do one more stupid thing before we can call it a day. We're heading back with all our stuff across the lake to the truck and I am riding on the front of the boat (because I like it up there) while wearing my cowboy hat that I bought for in Jamaica when I turn my head to look backwards and (of course) it flies off. Now, normally he would just tell me to suck it up, but considering my mood snap earlier he turns around to go find it. We come up to it and it is about two feet under water. Knowing it won't be within reach for much longer I go jumping off the front of the still moving boat. In front of it. Thankfully he guessed I was gonna be that stupid and had already started turning the boat so as not to run over me with the prop. Mission accomplished, I came up witht he hat in my hands and a lungfull of water. Coughing all the way back to the boat.

And that was my weekend trip.

By the way, we are now both very very sunburned. Him more so than me because I had a base tan. Which is funny because he has a head start on me being native and all and I'm naturally pale as pale can be. Men are sissies when sunburned too.

****** I will have to add the pictures at another time because blogger is being a particularly mean spirited bitch today and tried to lose my post again.********

Monday, July 24, 2006

Pissed off

I had a whole post written up about my weekend at the lake and went to add a picture but then blogger froze up and closed down and lost the whole damn post. So I am now pissed off. I will maybe try to write the post again tomorrow. For now I give up.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Well it's about flipping time!

I finally got my satellite back. I have TeeeeeeeVeeeeeeee again!

Apparently when you phone Starchoice to have you service reconnected they must then approve your application through Satan. Cause seriously? We phoned on the fourth to have it done. I expected at least a week, but seriously, it's the 20th now. How busy does it get in one town? Does only one person in all of beer town do installations?

Thinking about it though, having no tv I sure got alot of work done around the house.

Monday, July 17, 2006

This Weekend in Conversations

We had our first visitors this weekend. And it was so much fun, despite the late nights and early mornings. They have two children, so it was an interesting change for me.

Riley(3yrs): "Where's Uncle?"
Me: "He's just in the bathroom right now. He won't be much longer."
Riley: "No. One time uncle was over at my house and I had to pee, and he was weally weally wong pooping, and so I had to go outside and pee on a twee."
Me: Laughing hysterically.

Scene: Bedroom. 5 am or so.
Hubby: "Are you going to do some laundry?"
Me: "Today? Yeah sure."
Hubby: "Right now. Go do a load of laundry."
Me: "Fuck you, I'm sleeping. I'll do a load once it's not 5am."
He claims to not remember saying this. I'm inclined to believe him due to his penchant for sleep talking nonsense.

Scene: Bedroom, looking for a pair of shorts to lend to Michelle. Hubby and Heath are making breakfast.

hubby: "Cindy, will you please come take my place in the kitchen. I can't share my kitchen with him."
Me: "No. Now go play nice with the other little boys and share the kitchen nicely."
He leaves the room dejectedly.
Michelle: "Did he REALLY just come up here to ask you that?"
Me: "Yeah, he knew I wouldn't though. He just likes for me to know what he's doing at all times and have my undivided attention."
Michelle: "He's worse than a kid."


Me: "Kyla, can I have the boat key back?"
Kyla(2): "No, I'm pwayin wif it."
Me: "Ok, but be real careful with it, because if we lose the boat key Uncle will get really mad at me."
Kyla to Adam: "Uncle, you be nice to Aunty Cinny, ok?"
Hubby: "Okay"
Kyla: "Cause I like her, she's nice. So you be nice."

Scene: Saturday night. 2am bedroom
Me: "If you can't lay still I will hit you."
Him squirming annoyingly. So I knee him in the butt as hard as I can.
Me: "Seriously, if you don't stop moving I'm gonna go sleep on the couch."
he continues to move all over the bed.
Me: "fine, you fucker. I give up. I need to sleep."
8am he wakes up.
Him: " Are you sleeping on the couch? Why? Hey, you took all the pillows, why would you do that?"
Me: "It was that or kill you. And you're lucky I never took the blanket too."
Him: "My ass hurts. I must've fell down last night."
Me: giggles to myself. "Yeah, that must've been it."


Scene: on the beach, everyone around.
Me: "Hey, idiot!"
Michelle: "You call him names alot. So much so that since we've been here I've called Heath and idiot at least twice."
Adam: It's ok, Ive come to accept it."
Me: "Well in my defense, when I call him his name he either doesn't hear me or if he does, he then thinks I'm mad at him because I've used his name."

This is how beautiful Sunday was. That is my boat over on the right. There was not a single cloud in the sky the whole day.

Also, I was going to post some pictures of the house but blogger took twenty minutes to load this picture, so I don't have the patience for it today.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

He is growing a Soul

Last night, or rather yesterday the cat got out. Which somehow Hubby convinced me was okay because he figured that because the one other time he got out, he came back. So for some inexplicable reason, I went along with it. Until of course, it started to get dark.

So I started to worry.

He put in one of my movies to take my mind off it. So we watched Cheaper by the Dozen. Or tried to anyway. I kept walking outside to the deck and calling the cat.

After the movie he looks at me and says "I'm kinda worried too, the stupid little bastard has grown on me a little. Cause he hasn't been being a prick to me lately."

He and Thomas* are mortal enemies. They usually hate each other. Ever since we found him outside a bar one night, Tommy scratched up his speakers so hubby had him declawed and neutered. So they hate each other. Or rather he hates the cat. The cat ignores him now. He used to hiss and run away everytime he saw him.

Anyway, we went outside to search for Tommy. In the dark with the dogs because I am a big fat scaredy cat. We walked the full perimeter of our yard and then searched the sheds because you never know. Then just as we are about to head back, Jenny takes off running at full speed to the house. So I run after her because she may have seen a bear and was being smart.

What do I discover sitting there like he was there all along? Tommy.

The little bastard.


* Thomas is the name my mom gave to him when he came to live with her for a while, Thomas short for Thomas O'Malley, the Alley Cat. Get it? His original name given by me was Pumpkin because he was so small and his head was sooo big. Hubby named him Buster. The cat in question hates both the names we gave to him and will shoot you a dirty glare if you call him one.
Of course I came back. It's dirty out there ya know.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Weekend Project 06

So, Hi! I took Friday off, for no apparent reason. We actually never did go to the amusement park because "WE" decided that maybe "WE" should get some things done around the house.

Hardest part over MY ASS!!

Remember how I was so excited to stain all the wood in my house cherry to match my table? Somebody hit me next time I get ideas like that. I should know better, I went through the maniacal renovation phase leading up to my wedding at my parents house. I KNOW BETTER! Staining is bad. Very, very bad. And it gives you a wicked high that is a bitch to come down from. Proper ventilation is hard to accomplish when you can't let the cat out. Much to the cats chagrin.

Anyway this weekend I managed to finish the dining room walls. They are tongue and groove so it was really hard to do because I was working vertical. Thankfully I had a power sander, but seriously my back and shoulders are so sore I couldn't sleep last night. And when I did sleep i had weird stain induced dreams.

Anyway, I will post pictures of my Weekend Project 06 once I can find my cable to connect to the computer from my camera.

Also while "WE" were working on home renovations, one of us felt that playing with his new lawn mower was more important than sharing in the stain high. Bastard.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Confessions from the Middle of Nowhere

I am so covered in bruises I look like a junkie. Or that I have been beaten to within an inch of my life. Take your pick. Last count I had 15 bruises on my legs and at least 20 on my arms.

I really do LOVE my new house.

Except that we have to rip up the bathroom floor of our ensuite because as Hubby discovered he can put his finger through the floor beside the toilet. Plywood and all. Fun.

And we have to redo the ceiling in the main bathroom because there is moisture damage because the fan sucks ass.

BUT I am allowed to stain all the wood in the house cherry to match my precious precious table.

Which got wrecked in the move. There are scratches all over it because someones stupid stupid friends didn't care about maybe not wrecking all my stuff when we moved it into storage.

When I seen the damage I maybe cried a little. Or a lot. Whatever.

I hate, with the fury of a thousand suns, the bastard renters who were in this place before us. Apparently they decided that they, in fact, did not have to clean the house when they moved out. At least flush the damn toilets you PIGS!

Also, don't tell anyone, but dial up really isn't all that bad. Maybe its just that I am so happy to have computer access again.

I finally now have the tree house my dad promised me when I was four. Better late than never, I guess.


I am apparently not at Silverwood today because a certain lazy ass is still sleeping. So what that he worked all night, I want to go to an amusement park, dammit. Just Kidding. We'll go tomorrow.

Anyway I should maybe get off the computer now Who knows, maybe someone is trying to call me. By someone I mean my mom.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

I'm Baaaaaaack!

Well I've learned something very interesting about Telus. When they say, "yes indeed we will give you phone connection on this day" what they really mean is "fuck you, we will tell you one thing and then actually do it 4 days after we said we would. And? Totally not give you internet. So you have to phone us 18 billion times to get everything actually working and make you want to cry while having to talk to one of those phone prompters that aren't really people, but sound creepily alot like one."

So, a big Fuck You! to Telus.

Ahem, Hi everyone. I'm back finally and may even possibly resume regular posting for you all. Now doesn't that sound absolutely like a treat? Well that's all you're getting. So suck it up.

I am possibly bitchy, and tired. I have too much stuff that I can't part with. And it is all a pain in the ass to move when certain relatives promise to come help you move and then show up a day and a half late, just in time to help you drink the 48 beer that are now all nice and chilled in the fridge.

So a big thanks for nothing to a certain relative who will remain nameless. (shakes fist in air)

I figure if a relationship can survive moving, it can survive anything. However if he says one more time "here's another box of your stupid crap" I swear I will throw out every single one of his tools and laugh while he cries. So there.

My dogs seem to be adjusting to their new house quite nicely. Well to be perfectly honest they are just happy to be inside a house and allowed couch privileges. However Caesar seems to think that the deck is a perfectly acceptable place to go to the bathroom. He's lucky I never stepped in it. Oh well I know something he doesn't (He's finally going to be neutered and I am thrilled.) Hahahahaha! Hopefully he will stop sniffing Jenny's butt incessantly, because her patience is wearing thin.

Anyway, tomorrow we will hopefully be going down to Silverwood theme park for the day, because being jobless, I have nothing better to do. But maybe not because Hubby is on his last night shift tonight so he may be tired. Hopefully not though, because I really want to go on some roller coasters.


Also? Spell check just asked if I wanted to replace Fuck with Fiji. Isn't that funny? No? Maybe I'm just computer deprived. Oh well, from now on I think I will replace saying Fuck with Fiji. Won't that be funny? Shut up, I think so.