Sunday, September 06, 2009

Where does time go??

No, not referencing the fact that I havent posted in a month, but the fact that Hubby and I were at his 10 year reunion last night.

God, I feel old. Mind you I havent had my ten year yet (not till next year) but still the thought is the same. It makes you think back on when you were in high school, imagine how you thought your life would be at your ten year reunion. Glamorous no doubt. At least I expected mine to be. Rich, fancy cars, new house maybe even famous (I dreamed big) fabulous jet setting life. I wanted to come back and show all those that were mean to me in HS that I was better than them, had succeeded and so there for thinking they were better than me in HS.

But here I am, none of those things. I still havent even been to Europe yet, and that has been my dream since I was little. Now I just hope to go back and not be the fattest one there. Especially since I used to be the skinniest. God I sound vain.

I dont know, I just... never thought this would be my life. I always wanted something MORE than regular. Something to make me feel better, ya know? Something fabulous. SOMETHING.

Now before you go thinking I'm ungrateful for what I've got, I do realize that I have an amazing husband (who currently HATES his mother for badmouthing me. Hi Janet.) and the most wonderful well behaved toddler to ever exist, a nice house, we both have good jobs, and we arent in debt. I appreciate all this. And yet...

I still cant help but wonder what it would be had I chose the other path...

4 comments:

  1. i know exactly how you feel. my mother got mad at me (for real) the other day because i said that i wish i could be single (without husband and kid) for just a few days again. it was a comment i made after hearing that my single friends were taking a trip together to somewhere exotic. i wasn't invited (not surprisingly).

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  2. You DO have something!!! You have me!!!! LOL
    I know...I know...it's not quite the same thing. But, we are going to go to Europe together with no kids or boys!! We'll make it happen, once I win the lottery we'll both quit our jobs and go!

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  3. Sarah9:02 PM

    Hi Cindy, bored as ever I just remembered that you said you were blogging again so I creeped you and this is what I found. I hear you loud and clear and I thought I would have something inspiring to say to you but I don't. So I miss you is going to have to do because it means there are people like me who are a little less happy because they can't see you ever day and that means you matter, at least to me and really that's all we need....is to matter to somebody and you matter to alot of people:)

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